Be An Encourager

In your marriage you will realise that at various times you would have to choose either to blame or to forgive. Things will not always go the right way and as a result there will be errors, shortcomings and sometimes setbacks.

When things go wrong your spouse may already be feeling uncomfortable. These feelings are usually very unpleasant. If you are not sensitive to the feelings of your spouse at such times, you might still apportion blame and responsibility for error.

Errors or mistakes are bad enough in themselves, so when you blame, accuse, condemn or criticize, you expand and deepen the wound that your spouse is already feeling. You blame with your words, thoughts or actions.

Blame connotes rejection. You see, it doesn’t matter how careful you are, you will both make mistakes. A good way to help each other at such times is to speak words and act in ways that are full of love and faith. Do not judge your spouse, it will only worsen matters. Instead of nagging, murmuring or complaining, consciously affirm, stand by and encourage.

Assume joint responsibility. Stop and think about it, how would you like to be treated when you miss it? Do the same to your spouse. The mistakes we make are not that bad, the way and manner in which we handle them matter a lot. So be prepared and the next time your spouse makes a mistake, do not denounce him/her, but support and standby him/her and watch as God will help you to redeem the cost.

Your day of reaping will surely come, respond favourably to your spouse’s mistake, and in your time of need (error) you will find help in your spouse.

Forgiveness will heal your pain and loss.